Sleeping with the dictionary
I drink because I like to
And write because I need to

Two Minutes of Counseling “The Weird Friend”  

Stop worrying so much, because even though you don’t let anyone know, you are worried. You refuse to accept clichés—no one should blame you, because “dare to be different” should be stressed toward everyone, not just you. Eventually you’ll accept that some clichés are true, and that when you refused to fall in love you were craving it all along. It’s okay that you don’t have all the multiple choice answers. It’s even better if you do. The most intelligent people are definitely the weirdest, and likely the saddest (also somewhat cliché). There’s a whole other colony of people out there who are not “just like you,” but they’re weird too, and once you find them you’ll feel less heavy but less special. It’s a good thing that you know Slaughterhouse-Five is not the name of a vegetarian-run documentary on Netflix. You may never be outwardly proud of your accomplishments and the things you know, but you should be. You will find people to talk about books with, I swear. You were the smart one choosing not to wear Juicy sweatpants in middle school, because all of those stores are currently being shut down. I know middle school was bad; we don’t have to talk about it. Every group of friends deserves someone who is/was a virgin until they are/were twenty. You do/did not deserve the ridicule. The people who made fun of your stuffed animals on the bus in third grade are all pregnant or STD-ridden. Every outcast has an amazing story; find a way to tell it. Don’t let them make you feel bad that you didn’t cry during that chick flick that you didn’t want to watch in the first place. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad, because I know you’ve had enough of it. If you’re enamored by video games and the internet, go outside. If you love nature, get addicted to a video game for a while. And just think: some people don’t even have friends! 

[In honor of this, inspired by my favorite person Jonathan Safran Foer, I timed myself and listed two minutes worth of my most prevalent social anxieties. Enjoy.]

Two Minutes of Social Anxiety

Phone calls with strangers anxiety
Ordering food high or sober anxiety
Too many empty water bottles in your room anxiety
The end of your favorite novel anxiety
‘Watch the Gap’ anxiety
Tractor trailer anxiety
Something missing from your Taco Bell order anxiety
Asthma anxiety
Jogging through your neighborhood and seeing someone you know anxiety
Seeing someone you know from high school anywhere in the world anxiety
Buying tampons anxiety
The wrong person seeing something you wrote on Tumblr anxiety
Not making the most of your summer anxiety
Not making the most of your life anxiety

"Can’t see my way clear. As though everything I possessed had escaped me, and as though it would hardly satisfy me if it still returned."
- Franz Kafka, from Diaries  (via 100000anneeslumiere)

(Source: violentwavesofemotion, via coldnovemberhands)